Poem-A-Day April 5: crowdsourced

Hello Friends,

Poetry comes from all places, including Instagram. Today’s poem by Sierra DeMulder, from her 2023 collection Ephemera, is what I would call a Found Poem — one that takes existing texts and excerpts, reorders, and collages them into a new whole piece.

Enjoy.
Ællen


I Asked Why Have You Denied Yourself Love

     Answers crowdsourced from the author’s Instagram. Italics denote direct quotes.

Absent parent(s)

and the man who made me
mistrust ever man after.
I haven’t earned it yet—

what is love if not a salary?
The sweet treat we get
for being demure.

It feels too selfish,
too vulgar, unladylike
to gorge myself

on the moist cake of it.
I’ve got bad credit,
a pretty sibling, a rank

history of mistakes,
each one more foul
than the last. The timing

was all wrong.

The timing was right
but I was afraid

of losing it.
I am disorganized.
My brain is broken,


and it was stuck on something
I thought was love.

I’ve spit out it before

just to prove that I can.
I believe I am ugly.

and in the end,

it’s just easier this way,
familiar as a callous,
tongued over like

a cracked tooth:
suffering feels cleaner,
because if I start to believe

I actually deserve love,
I’d have to find
unacceptable all

those incapable of
giving it.


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